Newtonian Art

Self promotion is a subtle business. The most important thing is to not leave any fingerprints.

People bitch and bitch and bitch, but the thing to keep in mind is that water seeks its own level. Oh, I've heard so much moaning about the the music industry regarding its suppression of music artists, and how it is so tough to get a break. Nonsense! I've been directed to stuff on YouTube, Soundcloud, and Reverb Nation. I haven't heard any Beatles level material. Remember that they were turned down by a record company, or two, before they went on to synthesize all of the existing contemporary musical conversation into a hugely successful, and still appreciated, set of works. And then they transcended the conventions at hand.

Why is the artworld still caught up in deconstructionist and decadent motifs? (Because it is sexy!) Pop, though, taught us that appealing to the masses was a means of obtaining affirmation and appreciation for our work. The Internet and social media are tools for us to connect with a broader audience. You are not locked in and blocked by powers that be. The online world provides an alternative means for networking into the prurient world of art.

What was I trying to say?

We might be starving artists, but we don't have to be silent. Make enough noise and people will begin to pay attention. But make sure that you are actually offering art. Forget about your degree this, and degree that. They can teach craft, but they cannot teach art. If you are really making art, it will receive its equal and opposite reaction. It's physics!

I know, I know

I know you what you want to read about, but that is not allowed here. I will get cancelled again. I am not allowed to write about practices, health, fant-acies, consequences, amusing situations, repercussions, lawful-or-unlawful acts, or paying for it. It's just art, politics, economics, and other forms of idiocy. I know you're disappointed. Maybe I can post to one of those psy-burrrrr rooms you frequent. Maybe I can develop a code. Knockwurst! That would be a good codeword, wouldn't it?

Geez, maybe I need to figure out a different way to monetize this bugg-gurrr. Sorry for the misspellings, but I cannot be too careful. I cannot use the word pennitr8 even if I am talking about entering the fifth dimension. Remember that band? The whole band, and that would be... unacceptable. Verboat en! And now all I can think of is obtuse ways of referring to... gross domestic product.

That is what censorship looks like. Pretty, isn't it?

Student Paper Column Preview

Now you're in for it! I mean, you're in for a treat. I am writing a column for the student paper at college, and you get to preview it here due to a fortuitous coin on Ken White's Coin Flipping Page.

And now, without any further apologies...

The Joys of Being a Non-Traditional Student

 by Jeffrey David Lawson

           First of all, you are viewed with confusion. “Are you the professor?” No, most assuredly not. I am a full-time student at an advanced age. There is no satisfying way of explaining this situation other than to say, “I won the lottery and decided that finishing a degree would be an enriching experience.” If you would like to engage in a thought exercise, try to think up a good reason for a middle-aged person to be a full-time college student. It cannot be done.

            People know this intuitively, so once they know that you are just a student, you are placed in the suspicious folder. The best policy is to recede as near to invisibility as one can. Just assume the down low and wait for people to gradually decide that you are… harmless. Maybe, if you are lucky, some might decide that you are… smart, entertaining, helpful. No. That is hoping for too much. Learn to appreciate benign tolerance and call it a day.

            So if you successfully register as an inanimate object (lamppost) that can give simple directions, you will have a smooth time to appreciate the surroundings. Whenever I step out of the Lion’s Den (on campus student center) and head toward class, I get this odd feeling that I am at a resort in Wisconsin. I keep thinking, “Where is the lake? I want to go for a boat ride.” (In the case of winter, just substitute snowmobile for boat.) However, instead of darts, pool, and beer, all I get is lectures, labs, and term paper research. It leads to a different kind of hangover.

            And then there are the girls! Blocks of wood! And you get an attaboy if you catch the reference to Professor Henry Higgins’s stated attitude in Shaw’s Pygmalion. It is difficult to not look at people. You end up colliding with them. So I have to look. But I am pretty innocent about it. Being the artistic type, I might allow myself to appreciate raw beauty. However, I have a reputation of some kind, and it needs to be maintained. You get another attaboy if you recognize the artistic ambiguity in that last statement.

            Truthfully, I had thought that I would meet a CONTEMPORARY nursing student who had returned to school for similar reasons to my own. Think of it; smart, practical, and able to care for me as I ease into decline, a nurse would be a wonderful choice if men actually had some control in those matters. Alas, fate has managed to keep my nurse away from me. And I’m feeling kind of achy. My back has been making clicking sounds when I sneeze.

            I suppose I should mention the curriculum and faculty. The curriculum is pretty much what I expected, but the faculty is wonderful. They are very approachable and helpful as a rule. They seem to be sympathetic to those of us who are sticking out like the lone dandelion in a lawn. I think they appreciate our maturity. (Read maturity as “those who have suffered copious abuse.”) The one criticism that I have is that they have habits. The most glaring one is that when they are explaining germane things their voices shift tone in a way that makes you think that you are an eighteen year-old who is having something explained to them. This flaw does not bother me. At my age you do not complain about anything that makes you feel younger.

            I am sure I have other impressions and opinions about being an almost-elderly college drop in, but I am having a senior moment. All I ask is that you dial 911 if you ever see me lying on grass, concrete, or linoleum. A couch is okay though. I do take naps. Thank you!

 

A Peak at the Future

I added a PayPal Donate button over to the right under the header LOL Tips. Will people use it? Rather than answer that question I am going to listen to a white noise generator for fifteen minutes to clear my mind of impure thoughts. It might clear out about 85% of the current content.

Good. I am once again a tabula rasa. Innocent. Idle. Un-besmirched. Just waiting for the genetic code to re-afflict everything that it afflicted the first time around.

I have forgotten all of your names.

I have forgotten all of your faces.

I have forgotten whether, or not, I am good at making friends.

About all I have left is the godddammmend "I" and a flashing cursor on what I guess is my laptop.

Now... what is the first thing you want to tell me?

I bet my response to 90% of the statements will be "You've got to be effin' kidding me!"

I am a skeptic.

Message Sent to Google Feedback

So I get canned from Google AdSense for using naughty words and adult situations. The email, as I recall, said that my stuff may not be porn, but it is still not allowed. So I leave this mess for awhile, and I am perplexed because ads had appeared on my page that were naughtier than me. Upon my return I notice that AdSense is displaying on the parked blog. What gives? Has there been a policy change, or are you taking your hypocrisy to a higher level?